In the middle of the twenty-first century when Tom Waters first heard
that he could undergo rejuvenation treatments that would make him look and
feel 30 years younger, the 50-year-old man thought it was too good to
be true.
“Okay, Doc, what's the catch?” asked Tom.
“There is no catch,” said Dr. Danton. “Millions of people are
doing this all over the world now, with fantastic results. The
treatment I propose will be relatively modest. We'll only make your
body look and feel like it is 30 years younger. Some doctors are
doing rejuvenation treatments which make men as old as 80 look and feel like they
are only 20.”
“Tell me again – how is it going to work?” asked Tom.
“We'll be giving you four months of injections, once every week,”
explained Dr. Danton. “I could tell you the technical details about
how the telomerase will make the telomeres in your chromosomes like
the telomeres of a young man. I could give you all the facts about
how the restorative nanobots will fix the damage done by 30 years of
aging. But why bother getting into the details of the science? The
bottom line is: at the end of four months, you will look and feel
like a man of 20.”
Tom knew the treatment was very expensive, but he decided to give it
a try. He had recently divorced his wife, and he wanted his next mate
to be a much younger woman. He knew that many men his age went
chasing after women half their age, but he thought they looked
ridiculous when they did that. Tom figured: if I want to get a
20-year-old girlfriend, the best strategy is to look like a
20-year-old.
So Tom began the four months of injections. As the weeks passed, he
kept looking in the mirror. He was delighted to see his wrinkles
gradually fade away as the weeks passed. Tom noticed that his vigor
and sex drive seemed to increase a little with every passing week.
His hair gradually grew back, his skin tone improved, and he noticed
himself looking younger as every week passed.
Finally the four months were over, and Tom looked in the mirror. He
looked just as he had looked thirty years ago. Best of all, he had
all the energy and vigor that he had that long ago.
Tom went to Bob, a good friend of his, to show off his change in
appearance. He knocked on Bob's door. After opening his door, Bob
asked, “Can I help you?” Clearly he didn't even recognize Tom.
“It's Tom,” said Tom.
“Tom who?” asked Bob.
Tom laughed, and explained everything.
“It's just amazing,” said Tom. “When they roll back your age by
thirty years, no can even recognize you any more.”
Tom was now ready to go look for a sexy young woman to date. Yet he
wondered: when he met such a lady, should he tell her he was a
rejuvenated 50-year-old? No, he thought; that wouldn't work. There's
something ridiculous about a 50-year-old man chasing after a woman
half his age, Tom thought. Tom decided it was better to change his
name, and come up with a fake story of his life. That way when he met
Miss Sexy Young Thing, the woman would be more likely to accept him.
Tom then joined an online dating service that he hoped would find him
the type of female he was looking for. He specified that his name
was Rick Rogers, age 20. He also made it clear that he was looking
for a female no older than himself. Through the dating service, he
got in touch with a woman who he found very attractive. So Tom
arranged an in-person date with the woman. They met at a small
restaurant.
“I'm Jane,” said the woman. “So nice to meet you in person.”
“I'm Rick Rogers; pleased to meet you,” said Tom. “You look
even lovelier than you do online.”
“How old did you say you were?” asked Tom. The woman looked very
young, and Tom didn't want to get involved with someone underage.
“I just turned 18,” said the woman.
The two of them talked for hours at the restaurant. Tom had a strange
feeling that he had met the woman before, but he couldn't associate
her with any specific person he had met. It was almost the same kind
of mysterious deja vu feeling that the great songwriters
Rodgers and Hart had described in their classic song Where or
When.
After two more dates, Tom made his move. After kissing the woman
deeply, Tom said with a naughty look in his eye: “How about I show
you my apartment now?”
“I think I'd better not,” said the woman. “You may not believe
this, but I was raised by an incredibly old-fashioned mother. She
taught me that a good girl should never have sex with a man unless
they are married.”
At first Tom was disappointed. His rejuvenated body wanted some
sexual enjoyment now, not months later after some engagement and
marriage. But as Tom thought about it the next day, he decided
perhaps it was all for the best. Presumably Jane is a virgin, Tom
thought to himself, and therefore even more of a catch.
For a few weeks Tom and the woman carried on a passionate but
non-sexual relationship. Then one day while the two were walking
down a romantic river bank, Tom asked the woman to marry him.
She accepted the proposal immediately.
Tom was overjoyed. He began making plans for the wedding. Tom told
his best friend Steve about what had happened.
“Tom, don't you think you're rushing into this?” asked Steve.
“You've only known this woman for a few weeks.”
“Steve, I can tell if it's the Real Thing in a few weeks,” said
Tom. “When it's the Real Thing, I only need a few days to recognize
it.”
“Okay, but let me investigate this woman a little, just to make
sure that you don't get any nasty surprises,” said Steve. At first
Tom refused, but after some forceful arguing by Steve, Tom
reluctantly agreed.
Tom made plans for an expensive wedding. He decided to invite only a
few people, so that he would not reveal that his name and life story
were fakes. Tom made reservations for a wedding dinner at a very
fancy restaurant on the 124th floor of a new skyscraper.
On the day the wedding was scheduled, Steve met Tom at his apartment.
“So today's the big day!” enthused Tom. “She's going to make me
the happiest man in the world.”
“Tom, you'd better sit down,” said Steve. “I found some
shocking information about your fiancee.”
Tom gulped. “What is it?” he asked.
“Jane lied about her age,” said Steve. “She's not 18, not by a
long shot.”
“Oh no!” said Tom. “I should have known from her baby face –
she's underage, right?”
“No, that's not it,” said Steve. “The fact is: she's many years
older than 18. She had a rejuvenation treatment just like you did.
The treatment took decades off her age. That's why she looks 18.”
Tom winced.
“Okay, so maybe she's been around the block a few times,” said
Tom. “So she's probably not a virgin. I don't care. I love her, and
I'm going to marry her.”
“I also found out that her name isn't Jane,” said Steve. “She
apparently did the same thing you did when you got rejuvenated –
she changed her name and came up with a fake story of her life, so
people wouldn't find out how old she is.”
“What is her real name?” asked Tom.
“With the rejuvenation therapy changing both of your appearances so
much, she couldn't recognize you, just like you couldn't recognize
her,” said Steve. “And with both of you giving fake names and
fake life histories, there was no way for either of you to know you
had met before.”
“What is her real name?” asked Tom again.
“Dorothy Waters,” said Steve.
“Dorothy Waters?” shrieked Tom Waters, putting his hands on his
forehead as his face contorted in a horrified expression. “DOROTHY
WATERS?”
“Yes, Tom, it's true,” said Steve. “That sexy baby-faced young
girl you were going to marry today is your rejuvenated grandmother.”
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